From: beastah (beastah@attrition.org)
To: angela_1bishop@webdunia.com
Date: Tue, 29 Dec 2009 02:44:39 +0000 (UTC)
Subject: Re: CALL FOR YOUR KINDNESS

: I am Mrs. Bishop

I.  AM.  BEOWULF.  Just kidding, I'm BeAsTaH.

: my husband is Mr M.B.P.

Ever hear the song, O.P.P. from Naughty By Nature?  Your corpse of a
husbands initials and the song have a really nice ring to it, ARE
YOU DOWN WITH MBP (YA YOU KNOW MEEEEE).

: We were married for many years without our own biological child, so we
adopted a daughter.

So, why after so many years of marriage did you have NO kids?  Hubbys
baby batter had no swimmers or, are you totally baron. OR...did you hold
sex over his head like every other fucking bitch?  That's the fucking
problem with you chicks, dood works a hard ass day farming ivory on some
coast, wants to come home and drop some dood yogurt in the pink stink
ditch, but noooooo, you're at home all day, bathing a rhino and can't even
put out for the sake of the marriage, that's harsh Angela, fucking HARSH.
No wonder he killed himself...

: so we adopted a daughter.

Did you do the reverse Angelina Jolie thing and adopt a white chick?  If
so, please forward pics.  Of course she should be of legal age and
completely nude.

: Until he died we were both Godly minded.

HAIL SATAN, RIGHT ON!!!!!

: Recently; my medical reports shows that I am suffering of a serious
cancer problem

I suspect if they look further they'll discover other mental issues.

: I did not want to take any chances that may be regrettable.

Aye, I hear ya.  Like, this one time I was about to drop my man meat into
this crack whores ass and I was like, maybe I should wrap a grocery bag
around it, JUST to be on the safe side.  Well, good thing I did, he's
totally dead now and I don't even have itchy dick.  Err, I meant SHE'S
totally dead, shut up Lyger...

: So I call for your immediate hand

Um, I call for YOUR immediate hand, and mouth...

: I plead you to accept her as your daughter, friend and God child and
help in her better tomorrow.

Um, yah, for sure I will.  I mean, it will take a couple years to do the
paperwork and all that and like, if she's hot and stuff....NO GUARANTEES..
Does she currently have a gag reflex?

: I will brief you more details

I will de-brief your daughter...

: Thanks, as I anxiously hoping to hearing from you soon.

I'm all tingly in my balls in hot anticipation.

BeAsTaH

From: QUALITY CONTROL (d2d@attrition.org)
To: angela_1bishop@webdunia.com
Cc: beastah@attrition.org
Date: Tue, 29 Dec 2009 03:04:15 +0000 (UTC)
Subject: Re: CALL FOR YOUR KINDNESS

Quality Control ID: 34512312

Dear Mrs. Bishop,

Our quality control systems detected an inappropriate response sent to you on behalf of our organization.

Specifically, we understand that a reference to farming ivory was made.

Attrition.org is well aware of international regulations in place on the importation and exportation of 
ivory products, and we do not condone the killing of elephants or other tusk-bearing creatures.

We only condone the killing if pigs, sheep, cows, chickens, ducks, pheasants, frogs, carpenter ants, 
earwigs, and suicide bombers (all of the aforementioned for nutritional or necrophilia purposes only).

Sincerely,

Dee Dee Winters
Level 2 Quality Control Specialist

From: lyger (lyger@attrition.org)
To: QUALITY CONTROL (d2d@attrition.org)
Cc: angela_1bishop@webdunia.com, beastah@attrition.org
Date: Tue, 29 Dec 2009 03:19:26 +0000 (UTC)
Subject: Re: CALL FOR YOUR KINDNESS


Mrs. Bishop:

I would like to apologize for the email sent by our quality control team.
Clearly, attrition.org does not condone the killing of any animals.
Suicide bombers, yes, but not animals.  I shall personally take care of
this matter in a manner befitting of our organization's professional
stature.

Dee Dee, please come to my office as soon as you receive this.  As per the
"normal" meeting, kneepads are mandatory, facial tissues optional.

Thank you,

Larry Yger
Staff Operations Manager, PMP
Attrition.org


On Tue, 29 Dec 2009, QUALITY CONTROL wrote:

": " Quality Control ID: 34512312
": "
": " Dear Mrs. Bishop,
": "
": " Our quality control systems detected an inappropriate response sent to you
": " on behalf of our organization.
": "
": " Specifically, we understand that a reference to farming ivory was made.
": "
": " Attrition.org is well aware of international regulations in place on the
": " importation and exportation of ivory products, and we do not condone the
": " killing of elephants or other tusk-bearing creatures.
": "
": " We only condone the killing if pigs, sheep, cows, chickens, ducks,
": " pheasants, frogs, carpenter ants, earwigs, and suicide bombers (all of the
": " aforementioned for nutritional or necrophilia purposes only).
": "
": " Sincerely,
": "
": " Dee Dee Winters
": " Level 2 Quality Control Specialist

From: LEVEL 3 SUPPORT (jericho@attrition.org)
To: angela_1bishop@webdunia.com
Cc: QUALITY CONTROL (d2d@attrition.org)
Date: Tue, 29 Dec 2009 03:18:16 +0000 (UTC)
Subject: Re: CALL FOR YOUR KINDNESS


Apologies Mrs. Bishop,

I am Jared, Level 3 Support and manager or the QC group here at
attrition.org. It has come to my attention and inbox that Dee Dee has
misrepresented our stance:

: We only condone the killing if pigs, sheep, cows, chickens, ducks,
: pheasants, frogs, carpenter ants, earwigs, and suicide bombers (all of
: the aforementioned for nutritional or necrophilia purposes only).

We do NOT condone the killing of pigs, sheep, cows, chickens, ducks,
pheasants or frogs. What Dee Dee meant was peasants, please excuse this
unfortunate typo.

Jared E. Richo
Level 3 Support
QC Group Manager
attrition.org

From: QUALITY CONTROL (d2d@attrition.org)
To: LarryYger (lyger@attrition.org), LEVEL3SUPPORT (jericho@attrition.org)
Cc: beastah@attrition.org, angela_1bishop@webdunia.com
Date: Tue, 29 Dec 2009 03:42:32 +0000 (UTC)
Subject: Re: CALL FOR YOUR KINDNESS

Quality Control ID: 34512319

Dear Mr. Yger and Mr. Richo,

According to policy book 13, section 3, paragraph 8:

"The official position on the murder of pigs, sheep, cows, chickens, ducks, pheasants, frogs, carpenter ants, 
earwigs, and suicide bombers is that they may only be killed for food, or to have sex with.  
Failure to comply with this...[snip]"

I am merely following the policy books as I have been instructed.

If book 13 has been amended, please do send me the amended copy, as I have yet to receive it.

Mr. Yger, I am on my way to your office, with knee pads and facial tissues per policy book 16 section 5, 
subsection 2.  Do I need to follow protocol in subsection 5?  If so the mop is being borrowed by cji, 
our resident illegal immigrant.

And Mrs. Bishop, I sincerely apologize for any confusion.

From: lyger (lyger@attrition.org)
To: QUALITY CONTROL (d2d@attrition.org)
Cc: LEVEL3SUPPORT (jericho@attrition.org), beastah@attrition.org, angela_1bishop@webdunia.com
Date: Tue, 29 Dec 2009 04:02:35 +0000 (UTC)
Subject: Re: CALL FOR YOUR KINDNESS


Ms. Winters:

On Tue, 29 Dec 2009, QUALITY CONTROL wrote:

": " Quality Control ID: 34512319
": "
": " Dear Mr. Yger and Mr. Richo,
": "
": " According to policy book 13, section 3, paragraph 8:
": "
": " "The official position on the murder of pigs, sheep, cows, chickens, ducks,
": " pheasants, frogs, carpenter ants, earwigs, and suicide bombers is that they
": " may only be killed for food, or to have sex with.  Failure to comply with
": " this...[snip]"

You clearly did not receive the updated amendment to the manual, which
states:

"The official position on the harmful treatment of any animal, including
humans (other than suicide bombers, television reality show participants,
and Ankit Fadia) is strictly prohibited unless Exception Form H-1(n)(1)
has been completed and approved by management."


": " I am merely following the policy books as I have been instructed.

Failure to read policy updates is *your* failure.  We post these in
multiple places such as the parking garage, inside break room microwaves,
and above the urinals in the men's restrooms.  Your failure to use the
men's restrooms, despite being vaginally-challenged, has been duly noted.


": " If book 13 has been amended, please do send me the amended copy, as I have
": " yet to receive it.

Until you have completed Form 501(c)(3) with Human Resources to verify
your gender change, please check the break room microwave.


": " Mr. Yger, I am on my way to your office, with knee pads and facial tissues
": " per policy book 16 section 5, subsection 2.  Do I need to follow protocol
": " in subsection 5?  if so the mop is being borrowed by cji, our resident
": " illegal immigrant.

Just get in here. CJI will take care of any "residual effect" per his
contract (which is up for renewal and under serious reconsideration)

": " And Mrs. Bishop, I sincerely apologize for any confusion.

(don't believe her, she's a dumb cunt)