From: hellNbak (hellnbak@nmrc.org)
To: Helen Baker (helen_baker@coolstats.com)
Cc: sender@coolstats.com, info@coolstats.com, support@coolstats.com
Date: Thu, 21 Nov 2002 18:50:15 -0600 (CST)
Subject: Re: nmrc.org

Hi Helen,

Its funny you emailed me when you did.  I was just sitting here with Russ,
my shaven midget poolboy, talking about nmrc.org traffic patterns and our
web audience.  Unfortunately our conversation was suddenly interupted when
Sheila our newly aquired lamb began to buck.  You know she just isn't as
well trained as her mother Lisa.

Anywho... We already have a pretty good idea of our traffic patterns and
audience.  Allow me to break it down to you;

Web Audience:

Hackers
Wanna-be-hackers
governments foreign and local
Sheep worshippers
Scene whores
crack whores
drunken catholic priests
alter boys who walk funny and
homeless midget prostitutes.

So as you can see we have a very niche market.  I can't help but feel like
that we are not serving the last two demographics well.  Perhaps coolstats
can help us with that.

As for traffic patterns.  We see a normal bandwidth usage pattern that has
been consistant ever since we started streaming our oscar nominated short
film "She was a baaaaad girl" and of course the sequel, "repent young
alter boy, repent, you have been baaaaad".

Of course on the day of the live shaving traffic spikes and it throws our
stats off a little but I think we have a pretty good idea.

Take your spam and shove it up your mothers ass, remove it, then shove it
up your own.

Thank you.


On Thu, 21 Nov 2002, Helen Baker wrote:

> Date: Thu, 21 Nov 2002 17:14:57 +0800 (CST)
> From: Helen Baker (sender@coolstats.com)
> Reply-To: Helen Baker (helen_baker@coolstats.com)
> To: hellnbak@nmrc.org
> Subject: nmrc.org
>
> Hi,
>
> I thought you might be interested in getting in-depth knowledge
> about your web audience and web traffic patterns in a reliable
> and cost-effective way.
>
> Stop Guessing - Start Knowing!
> - CoolStats measures web site traffic and online behavior of
>   your visitors.
> - CoolStats will help you understand how to optimize your site
>   to meet the needs of your visitors.
> - You get access to detailed, real-time statistical analysis of
>   your web pages - 24 hours a day. Click at
>   http://www.coolstats.com/viewdemo/index.html to view Online Demo.
> - CoolStats is the ultimate real-time tracking solution for
>   small and mid-sized businesses.
> - 100% accuracy by measuring activity at the client, not via
>   server based log files.
> - The fee of $24.95 is minimal compared to what it would cost
>   you to run a tracking service yourself!
>
> Why CoolStats?
> - no programming to do
> - no servers to maintain
> - no software applications to install
>
> Click at
> http://p1j2m3a4.pdhost.com/pdsvr/www/r?1000006865.820.15.+akffPXN4K7pyb
> to Sign Up now!
>
> "We needed to make business sense out of our web visitor behavior -
> CoolStats delivers first-class graphical reports that help us
> continuously improve and optimize our website to match the
> requirements of our target audience." BRYAN KASHILIN, BOSTON
>
> Click at http://www.coolstats.com/product/customerref.html to
> check what other customers say about us!
>
> For more information about our website tracking services,
> please visit our website or contact me directly at the below
> email. I look forward to hearing from you soon.
>
> Best regards,
> Helen Baker
> CoolStats Support
> Email: helen_baker@coolstats.com
> Http://www.coolstats.com
>
> Don't be the last one to know!