[Infowarrior] - We Must All Do Our Part To Preserve This Climate Of Fear

[Richard Forno]

(gotta love the Onion!  Thx to Anonymous.  --rf)

We Must All Do Our Part To Preserve This Climate Of Fear

By M. Willard Thornton
January 30, 2008 | Issue 44€05

http://tinyurl.com/2hwun3

The last six years have been a golden age of American apprehension and
mistrust. Thanks to the events of Sept. 11, 2001, all of America was united,
standing shoulder to shoulder in sheer, unrelenting fear. But tragically,
that atmosphere of panic and confusion has begun to fade, and without
another terrible attack to bond us as a nation, we are dangerously close to
entering a post-post-9/11 era.

We cannot allow that to happen.

We must all do whatever we can to preserve America by refocusing our
priorities back on the contemplation of lethal threats‹invisible nightmarish
forces plotting to destroy us in a number of horrific ways. It is only
through the vigilance and determination of every patriot that we can
maintain the sense of total dread vital to the prolonged existence of a
thriving, quivering America.

Our country deserves no less than every citizen living in apprehension.

Fear has always made America strong. Were we ever more determined than
during the Yellow Scare? When every Christian gentleman lived in mortal
terror of his daughter being doped up on opium and raped by pagan,
mustachioed Chinamen? What about the Red Scare, when citizens from all walks
of life showed their pride by turning in their friends and associates to
rabid anticommunists? Has America ever been more resolute?

Not so very long ago, we winced every time we saw someone with facial hair
or a backpack. Average people were terrified of opening their mail for fear
of getting a face full of anthrax. Those were perhaps our country's greatest
days. Yet that once-phobic spirit that defined our times is drastically
changing.

Today, people are making eye contact with strangers on the street. They are
whistling on subway platforms, strolling down sidewalks, and generally
behaving as if they do not feel they could be killed at any moment. Children
can be seen running playfully in public parks, their parents smiling and
watching idly from afar when they should be obsessing over an unseen child
abductor who will snatch and rape their babies first chance they get. It
breaks my heart to see the land I love fall into such a state of non-panic.

My God, what have we become?

We can no longer rely solely on our enemies to menace the populace‹we must
find that horror within ourselves. Though we have made great strides in
frightening ourselves about illegal immigrants, bird-flu pandemics, and
random psychotic school shootings, it is not enough. What happened to that
country I used to know and love, where a Korean grocer could be killed out
of irrational xenophobia merely because someone thought he was an Arab? Such
an act is, I am disappointed to say, almost unthinkable in today's
increasingly less-than-utterly-petrified climate.

You may say, "I am only one person. What can I do?" But all of our efforts
are needed if we are to maintain a state of constant anxiety. We can all do
more, but here is a good starting place: Twice a week, for at least 15
minutes, take the time to worry about any Muslims who may live in your area;
lose sleep each night thinking about our thousands of miles of unguarded
borders; stock up on water bottles and canned goods for no discernible
reason other than that vague sense that civilization will collapse any
second; as the election heats up, be sure to support candidates whose
rhetoric appeals to your base survival instincts and fight-or-flight
reflexes rather than to your hopes and dreams.

And remember: Each and every one of us, no matter how big or small,
possesses the ability to jump to conclusions.

The strength of our nation depends on all of us feeling‹and, more
importantly, acting‹as if a sniper could blow our head off at any moment.
Let's all come together as in fearful days of yore and do what we must to
keep America free from peace of mind once and for all.