[attrition] review: Oceans 13, Pirates: At World's End, Live Free or Die Hard, Transformers

[lyger]

http://attrition.org/movies/bits14.html

(by Martums)

Oceans 13
2007

Plot Summary: Essentially rehash same old crap because the studio is run 
by whiney little bitches who won't put out new material with any 
substance.

George Clooney needs to hang it up. So does the writing staff. 
Congratulations to Brian Koppelman and David Levien for getting 50,000 
monkeys to hammer out this regurgitated piece of sequel vomit. You call 
that a screenplay?

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
2007

The gang summons the nine pirate Captains that make up the Brethren Court 
to stop Davy Jones, his cursed love interest, and the infinitely pathetic 
Lord Cutler Beckett, ultimately bringing peace to lost souls that Jones 
has neglected.

Live Free or Die Hard
2007

Please God, let it be the last.

Nasty, stinky, evil terrorists employ the use of some naive crackers to 
develop code which can ultimately cripple the infrastructure on the East 
Coast, essentially bringing civilization to its knees. John McClane will 
take it from here.

Transformers
2007

Autobots fight to protect humanity from the Decepticons. Bah! Plot 
summaries...who needs 'em?

The unexpected winner of the Summer Blockbusters to date has to be 
Transformers. Can you remember the last time you were in a theater and the 
people applauded at the end? Me neither. Well, they did. Not only did it 
beat expectations, it shook the very foundation of cinematic 
entertainment, going back some 100-odd years. OK--slight exaggeration.

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