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=   F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K.   =
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				The New Hackers
				~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

	Timmy was in a hurry. He weaved and ducked through the crowds of 
people littering the sidewalk as he rollerbladed to the meeting. Today 
would be great; he grinned in anticipation of the coming festivities.
	Earlier that week, he had thrown a party at his house, over his 
parents' protests. He invited several of his hacker buddies -- his 
"d00ds" -- over for a night of movie watching. He had rented all the old 
classics -- _Wargames_, _Sneakers_ and _Hackers_ -- from the laserdisc 
store across the street. His favorite was _Hackers_; the movie showed 
exactly what the life of a hacker was like. He wanted to impress the 
"eleets" at the meeting with his inside knowledge of the classic movies.
	As far as he knew, all the eleets had gotten their start in 
hacking when they watched the movies at an impressionable young age.
	He jumped a final concrete barrier and skidded to a stop at the 
July 1, 2011 meeting of the local "2600 klub."
	
			            *  *  * 

	The eleets were impressed with Timmy's knowledge of the classics. 
They might even give him a handle so he wouldn't have to be known as 
"Timmy" any more. *They might even let me pick my own handle*, he hoped. 
	"Y0 Timmy!" shouted St0l3n Phunds, the eleet bank expert. "Come 
show Monit0rhead how well you know _Wargames_." 
	"OK. Ummm...'shall we play a game?'"
	"Kewl!" said Monit0rhead. "Do you remember how to get free calls 
from a payfone?"
	"Sort of...." Timmy racked his brain, trying desperately to 
remember how Matthew Broaderick had made a free call. Something to do 
with a paperclip. "Uh...you shove a paperclip through the part you talk 
into, right?"
	"I'm impressed," Monit0rhead told St0l3n Phunds. 
	Enthusiastic over his lucky guess, Timmy said, "let's try it! I 
have a paperclip in my bag, and there's a bank of fones right over there!"
	The eleets had all quieted down suddenly at Timmy's outburst. 
"Hey man," one of them said, "are you stupid, or what?"
	"Dewd, you must be joking," said St0l3n Phunds menacingly. "Do 
you want to get busted or something? It's much too dangerous to try 
something like that! It only works in the movies anyway."
	Timmy knew that the eleet hacking tricks he had learned in the 
classics didn't work in real life any more, but the fact had slipped his 
mind. Nobody he talked to, not even the eleets, seemed to know how to 
hack in real life.
	He sat through the rest of the meeting feeling like he had eaten 
broken glass. The eleets all ignored him, and all the wannabes followed 
their lead, as usual. He had no chance of ever getting his own handle now.
	The meeting quickly broke up after a couple of hours, since 
nobody had anything to talk about other than the movies which most of 
them already knew by heart. H0nch0, for instance, had seen _Hackers_ 23 
times already, and he was only 17. Timmy watched as all his acquaintances 
rollerbladed away.
	He looked at the bank of fones, then remembered the paperclip in 
his bag. He also had some other metal things that he could try.
	Timmy walked to the fones and began his search for a new hack.


-Legion


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= Questions, Comments, Bitches, Ideas, Rants, Death Threats, etc etc...   =
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