Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs are.
  The first  man was an Engineer, the second man was an Accountant,
  the third man was a Chemist, the fourth was a Government Worker.

  To show off, the Engineer called to his dog.  "T-Square, do your stuff."
  T-square trotted over to a desk, took out some paper and a pen and promptly
  drew a circle, a square and a triangle. Everyone agreed  that was pretty
  smart.

  But the Accountant said his dog could do better.  He called his dog and
  said, "Slide Rule, do your stuff."  Slide Rule went out into the kitchen
  and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles
  of 3 cookies each. Everyone agreed that was good.

  But the Chemist said his dog could do better. He called his dog and
  said, "Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked over to the fridge,
  took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and
  poured exactly 8 ounces  without spilling a drop. Everyone agreed
  that was  good.

  The the three men turned to the Government Worker and said, "What
  can your dog do?"

  The Government Worker called to his dog and said, "Coffee Break, do
  your stuff."  Coffee Break jumped to his feet, ate the cookies, drank the
  milk, dumped on the paper, sexually assaulted the other three dogs,
  claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report
  for  unsafe working conditions, put in for Worker's Compensation and
  went home on sick leave.