Because You Demanded It... Do Not Mock the Unmarked Helicopter!!!   Hehehehehe!  Just when you thought it might be safe...I return!  Well, actually, I do not return.  I am not Joe.  Joe is a little unavailable at the moment though he assures me he is resting comfortably and yes, the Pentagon really does have a basement! Thus, let me introduce myself.  I am Juanita the Ghoul, Joe's younger, cuter and infinitely more hip younger sister by Dad's second wife (whew!)  I am here in his stead to entertain, delight, and make a mockery of all the NVA news that is fit to scandalize!  Yee Haw!  So without further adue, let me welcome you to the all new, all improved, and all not at all entirely different- JAUNITA THE GHOUL PAGE!!! First, I will begin with the good stuff...Here you see the only remaining picture of Joe the Ghoul.  Handsome devil, isn't he?  (By the way, Bunny, he wants to know if he can pick you up at 8pm...is that good for you?) I tried to capture the infamous Minutenus Smith on film, but alas he was too crafty for me and succeeded in destroying all of his personal records before I could ferret them out...So in his honor I begin with the "Timeless Rules for Survival In NVA"... 10.  Do not mock the Prince...whoever it is.  Unless you think you can get away with it, and even then be careful...Princes may bite! 9.  The Gangrel are still running that close-out sale on Wolf's Claws... Yours now for only $19.95, and not only will you get this useful pocket fisherman, but we'll throw in this lovely set of Ginsu knives for the next one hundred callers! 8.  Um, just a reminder, DO NOT LICK THE KEEPER! 7.  Okay, Temporis, we DON'T got that...are you happy now? 6. You too can have that Voodoo that the Tremere do so well...Just sign here...oh, come on, you don't really need to labor over all that fine print... 5. NEVER ask "hey, what's in that briefcase?" 4. Just remember, Jamal is always watching! 3. Always keep the Toreador entertained...leave them unattended for more than five minutes and you can expect a praxis seizure... 2. Obtenebration...It's not just a discipline, it is a LIFESTYLE! 1. If it's ticking, give it to the Brujah.  Just don't ever let them run with scissors! Okay, Moving right along... Keeping up with that oh-so important NVA Tradition, I proudly present Juanita's Hot Hunkalicious Hell-bound Honey's (of ill-omen) (in appearance of order)  

10th Honey of the World- Colin Jackson of Clan Brujah-   Okay, see, I like a man who can handle his stick!  Being that he is Canadian and all, you know he will always have a fridge stocked with beer and many methods for keeping warm at night.  In short, Colin is a honey!	9th Honey of the World- Richard King of Clan Tremere- Okay, word is around the Domain of NVA they call this guy "Big Dick King" for a reason.  Who am I to question?  Granted the guy is also armed like a small third world country, but I suppose with a name like that you have to protect the investment...
8th Honey of the World- Ligadier Truffaut of Clan Toreador- Aww, he's just soooo cute!  I want to hug him and pet him and call him "Liggy"! He's just sooo FABULOUS!	7th Honey of the World- Constance Weatherwax of Clan Malkavian- Now, I know my brother Joe told me a sure way to get killed in NVA is to date a Malk woman.  I am hoping that the curse does not stretch to the male side of the clan!  Constance has it all: looks, charm, a hat that says "Woody" and a very famous and wise Daddy...not to mention a subscription to the Dimwitty Anti-tribune!  This guy is definitely marrying material, single ladies!
6th Honey of the World- Capt. O'Donovan of Clan Toreador- Whooo!  It would be like datin' James Bond!!!  Shaken & Stirred, please!	5th Honey of the World- Flourian Laws, Follower of Set- The self-proclaimed king of party-boys is definitely the type of guy every girl should date at least once.  He's cute, cuddly, well-financed, and chances are he does not want to go home to meet the parents...but shoot, he sure knows how to have a good time!
4th Honey of the World- Liam Kilkenny of Clan Ventrue- He has the cutest little accent `swoon`.  Dresses nice, has his own driver, and if you can ignore the rather unnerving posse of thugs with guns and baseball bats that seem to be around him all the time, a great conversationalist!	3rd Honey of the World- Rictor Barnes of Clan Lasombra- I always did have a thing for those red-headed men!  Rictor seems to be casual, quiet, and quite pleasant if you can ignore his penchant for acts of mass carnage.  And, since he is a Lasombra, you'd never have to worry about someone walking in on ya and turning on the lights!
2nd Honey of the World- Frankie Luciano of Clan Tremere- You know how every Mafia movie has that one really cute mobster who wears the cool suit and looks like the mack even when he might be chopping up a body into small, easily disposable pieces?  The NVA Tremere have one of those and his name is Frankie!	1st Honey of the World- Sir Sexton Hardcastle of Clan Ventrue- Okay, here we have it all.  Money (he's a Ventrue), Power (he's the Prince), Athletic Talent(well, he plays pool pretty good) and Culture (that's what the "Sir" means, the guy really is a blue blood).  What more could any largely available single ghoul ask for?

  That's all for now, Folks! back to the links