=  F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K.  =

                        A Guide to Shoplifting!
                The author of this file is not responsible for any of the
                actions taken by the reader of this file.  This is for
                informational purposes only.

/ ///// // ////////////

        Since I started working at a grocery store, I have learned many
techniques to shoplifting.  I have learned some stuff by the mistakes
made by several shoplifters, and others by experiment.

RULE 1 :        NEVER NEVER NEVER try to steal something at a store you
                frequently shop at.  That is just plain stupid.  If you
                really want something bad enough, then spend a little
                gas money. Hey, its better than buying the product you
                are about to lift.

RULE 2  :       Don't act suspicious or nervous.  Employees aren't stupid.
                They know that if you are acting nervous, then you are
                usually up to something bad.

RULE 3  :       Try to steal from stores without video survaliance.
                This is by far the safest way to do things.

RULE 4  :       DO NOT be GREEDY!  Take a little at a time.  And take
                things that will fit in your pocket or purse.  Bigger
                items are harder to get away with.

RULE 5  :       Try not to hit the same stores over and over.  Have some
                variety in your life.  You will be less likely to be
                caught if you don't frequently go to the same place.

RULE 6  :       Do NOT be fooled by cameras with the name SVS.  These are
                fakes!  They do nothing but sit there.  They look real
                by the way they have a cable going into a wall, and are
                plugged in and have a red light on, but they are still
                fake.  GUARANTEED!

RULE 7  :       Do NOT be stupid enough to steal around other shoppers.
                I have seen many instances where the employees never
                saw a person shoplift, but a customer had turned a
                shoplifter in, and the customers word is just as
                incriminating as the employees.

RULE 8  :       Many times if someone sees you trying to shoplift, they
                will start following you around.  Calmly place the stuff
                back on the shelf, any shelf!  They really can't get you
                as long as you haven't walked by a register, and start
                walking out the door, because until you start walking out
                the door, you still could have intent to pay, and if they
                do pick you up for shoplifting before you walk out the door,
                your case most likely will not hold up in court.  Many
                lawyers have freed many shoplifters because of that.  If
                they pick you up.  Start telling them you haven't had a
                chance to pay, and that they can not pick you up for
                shoplifting, until you have a chance to pay, or walk out
                the door!  Just act like you know what you are talking about!

RULE 9  :       When you start walking out the door and you see someone
                following you, then run for dear life.  Most of the
                time you can get away.  If you have a get-a-way car waiting,
                then be sure that the license plate is covered up.  All it
                takes is for someone to write down the license plate number
                to get you caught.

RULE 10 :       If by any chance you are caught trying to flee, try and
                wrestle your way out, but BE CAREFUL!  Do not injure the
                person who is trying to catch you, let alone threaten them.
                If you just so happen to scratch them, the penalty goes from
                theft to Assult and Robery, which means a bigger fine, or
                more time!

RULE 11 :       Have someone waiting with bail money in case you get
                caught. *8-)

Now on to some ways to shoplift.

Method 1 :

        This is probably the easiest method.  Get a friend of yours to
go to a store with you.  Have him/her act very very suspicous.  When an
employee sees someone acting suspicous the key in on that person.  Soon
they will have everyone in that store watching him/her.  Then you go
where ever the merchandise is, and steal away.  You leave with whatever you
wanted, and then your friend leaves soon after, feeling good that he/she
has just fooled a store full of idiots.

Method 2 :

        If you are a woman, then get a big purse.  Empty it out, and
pick the lucky victim.  This works good at places with shopping carts.
Place your purse in the section where children sit.  Usually located at
the front of the basket.  Have your purse open at this point.  Go around
the store looking at whatever you like.  When you find the item, pick it
up, look at it, and casually sit it down like you are putting it in the
basket, but instead of putting it in the basket, put it in your purse.

Method 3 :

        Grocery stores are probably the easiest to hit.  Most have low
security if any.  Only problem, is that most people think the only thing
you can get at a grocery store is food.  WRONG!!  Go over to the more
expensive area, HBA (Health & Beauty Aids).  There is gold there.
Get everything from Advil to Obsession Cologne.  You ask yourself,
why do i need 80 boxes of Advil? Take one box for yourself, then go
sell the rest to friends, or take the stuff to a Flea Market, set yourself
up a booth, and sell away.  Most boxes of Advil cost around $8-$10 each.
You sell for $5, and instant profit.  But be careful in the HBA area, that
is usually where the security will be, if any!.  I have seen many stores,
with out any cameras in the grocery area, but one camera in the ceiling in
the HBA area.  So just pick up the stuff, put it in the basket, carry it
over to the grocery side, and take it!  Another good thing to take from
grocery stores is cigarettes.  A carton is getting close to $20 each. So take
yourself a few, and sell to your friends/family for about $10-$15.  Good
profit there. Or if you are into that nasty habit, keep them for yourself.

Method 4 :

        Whenever you need to get film developed, or prescriptions filled,
then take it to your favorite grocery store.  After you get your prescription
and/or film, tell the clerk that you are going to do some more shopping.
Walk around the store a little, then walk out the door.  A good idea is
to have a receipt from an old purchase. carry it in one hand, then carry
the goods in the other.  That way the look at you, see the receipt, and
think that you payed for it.

Method 5 :

        A good way to get free fertilizer, top soil, etc., is to go by
your favorite nursery or whoever carries the stuff outside.  Give them a
visit about 3 a.m. or so, and fill up your truck or car.  The best way to
do this is to have someone driving, while you fill it up.  If someone
comes out of the store (like a night stocker) and confronts you, jump in
the back of the truck, and tell your friend to take off.  Be sure to have
you license plate covered up.

        Stores today are not there for you.  They are there for themselves.
They may claim low prices, but in all truth the merchandise is usually marked
up 200% or more.  I have seen some instances where cologne has been marked
up 450%.  This is outrageous.  Why should we pay those kind of prices, when
we can get it for free!  Many stores may claim that shoplifting increases
prices, although the real reasons for price increases is the Upper Division,
who wants more added onto their 6 and 7 digit yearly salaries.  So don't
be fooled by that stupid warning.  And remember Robin Hood, steal from the
rich (THEM) and give to the poor (YOU, even if you aren't poor heh!).

                                       -Max Headroom of VIRaXe

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