Yes, it finally happened. Attrition.org sold out. But not to a corporation or anything, jeez... (why? you have angel funding?!), just in the product category. It all started with flasks that were created for pure efficiency, as they were the easiest way to booze it up in court and church. Then it turned into shirts and earrings. Next, pins, wristbands, and knit hats. Within a year, don't be surprised if we have Lazlo designer condoms and 'massagers'.
|A limited run of flasks was made available in December, 2009. Since then demand has steadily increased so we partnered with MakeItUrz to produce a second run. This time, black, with a catchy phrase too many of us can identify with. They are now available, on demand. Not only is MakeItUrz lazering them, they are handling the orders, shipping, and all of the glory. Want one? Click right here and be sure to leave flattering feedback!||After the new black matte flask was unveiled, of course some Internet heathens weren't content. They wanted the iconic chainsaw-wielding Lazlo on a flask. We wouldn't put up with their crap, but the fine folks MakeItUrz graciously met their irrational demands. Want one? Click right here and be sure to leave flattering feedback!||The awesome folks at Make It Urz, an official source for superior Lazlo merchandise, offer several items. These are available year 'round, because they are responsible and legitimate, unlike the staff here. These fine Lazlo earrings come in a wide variety of colors for your accessorizing pleasure. [Order]|
|The Make It Urz team also offers plastic lapel pins. These pins are available in the same material and colors as the earrings. Lazlo permitting, a higher quality metal version will be available in the near future, suitable for corporate environments where you want to proudly show that you don't buy into their bullshit. [Order]||Silicone wristbands, because they are cheap and easy, the way we like our dates and court hearings. A run of 250 are being created as this page is published, with an extra 100 thrown in free according to our vendor (obvious squirrel lover). We went the extra mile and opted to have these created in the U.S. instead of China (it's a check box, seriously). That also made them $0.15 more expensive per band. These will be given out in limited quantity at security and sex worker conventions throughout 2012. A small batch may be put on eBay for a silly price, so we can gouge our loyal fans.||The rare and elusive Lazlo Knit Hat. Only 4 are known to exist when this page was published, but you too can get one of these bad boys from our knitter critter, J. Renee Worsing. Contact her for details and payment options. Each hat runs $49.28 (includes S&H), and is created by hand in 5 to 10 business days.|
|For Defcon 19, a very limited run of Lazlo t-shirts were created. Sleeping with a staff member was the best bet on obtaining one. A year later, and there is not enough interest to do a second run. Sorry!||Make It Urz also offers a generic con badge to show your disdain of the pervasive FUD in our industry. Wear it proudly while claiming that it is an exclusive pass for the most swank party around, then proceed to make up colorful descriptions of said party in an effort to refine your social engineering skills. This badge is rumored to stop bullets, but we have not tested that feature. Your mileage may vary. The $10 + S&H you pay, will not vary. [Order]|
Copyright 2012-2013 attrition.org. Items bearing the attrition.org name or Lazlo image must be approved by jericho.